scarletmorning: (Selan)
Brain, why you no working today? ): I need you right now. I hate you...
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scarletmorning: (Meerschweinchen)
Yeah, I've had an op on Tuesday. I got sudden pain in my abdomen on Monday night and I was so bad that I blacked out, threw up horribly and other things. I've never felt so much pain before. My mother and father brought me to the ER, I got pain killers (hm~ morphine) and the off to the women's hospital. I had some kind of ovarian cyst. A very nasty bugger. It was taken out Tuesday morning and today, two hours ago I could leave the hospital. Pfew, I'm glad that that's over. The doctors and nurses were awesome and generally very sweet, but home is still soooooo much better.

Oh well, I have to catch up a bit with things 8D
scarletmorning: (Asthar)
Puh, I haven't been around much lately. Things were a bit stressfull, with that 20 page term paper breathing down my neck. Otherwise I managed well on my own those three weeks my family was in Canada. Jiji was with me so things were okay 8D

Now I finally can relax a bit and I do no longer hate everything. Yay~ 8D Now there's only this one project left, but I really like this one so it's not so bad.

Hm, need to write more again, but my muses are kinda gone at the moment. They're probably on vacation as well.

Oh well~
scarletmorning: (Hayden Hm)
I just watched Thor again (or rather selected scenes *coughOdinisaBamfcough* and the more often I watch that movie, the less I like Loki. He's a bubbling well of W.T.F. Just one thing that bugs me so very much; just why the fuck did both Beginning!Thor and Loki think that genocide would please Odin? He said several times that he wanted peace. In the scene where they were kids, later after the first attack and so on. WHY DID YOU TWO ASSHATS THINK GENOCIDE WOULD MAKE HIM PROUD OF YOU? ARE YOU STUPID?

I guess the answer is in both cases yes >8/ No sympathy for either of you.


Also, in the scene where Thor is captured by SHIELD and Loki comes to tell him Odin died? I hate Loki so much. I do not give a fuck why he might have done that. That was such an asshole move that I just cannot.


Blarghlaghlargh.
scarletmorning: (Jiji)
The awkward moment where a good half of the Starbucks crew greets you by name and ask if you want your regular ._. I go there far too often. Buuuuuut the shop is directly between my two departments D: Omnomnomnom.

Also, dabbled a bit. Little FE these days, a bit more interest in Etrian Odyssey. So addictive that game. Not as bad as The Binding of Isaac, though. 8D The game is so fun. I'm not particularly good at it, but it's fuuuuuuuuuuuun. Weeeeeeee. (And an awesome Let's Play by a guy who sounds very cute)

Apart from that, had some serious stress these last days. Had to finish a presentation on the same day as I had to hold it. I'm such a hero /sarcasm. Also, a few exams. Gotta have to study more. I'm far too lazy. <<
scarletmorning: (Persona 4)
In the morning I kinda wanted to make a rambly meta-y post, but now I just. I want everything to end or just stop. I'm just. So angry again and everything is annoying and I just want to curl up and never stand up again. Can't the whole world just stop moving? I'd appreciate it.

Fuck you, day.

Teaches me to take my anti-dep more regularly. Stupid head, who forgets all the important stuff.

Only positive thing today was that I suscribed to the next Swedish course.
scarletmorning: (Alestorm)
Aggggggggggggggggggggh.

I just.

Want to rant so much about Xenoblade because it could be a great game, but it just...

It finally picks up, but it's far too late. I just don't care.

>:/
scarletmorning: (Ammy XD)


8D

So, in other news.... I found something very strange out.

Very rarely I get "possessive" of pairings. With means that I only like one pairing of certain characters. Seeing them paired with other characters sends a strange feeling of... sadness mingled with a whiff disappointment over me. I don't know why that is. I have no reason to be sad or disappointed. The feeling is still there, however strange and unnecessary I think it is. I kinda was okay with that until now, because it was only one pairing.

But now... I do not ship it anymore. I lost practically all my interest in that couple. And yet... whenever I see them paired with someone else, this sadness/disappointment comes back D8 And I don't know why! It doesn't make sense :( Is this sentimentality? Some leftovers, because said couple was the reason why I started writing fanfiction? It's kinda... ridiculous. Any ideas how I could change that? :(

On a "happier" side: as soon as I want to gleefully tear a character down and want to do horrible things to them, they have risen to the rank of a "favourite character". It's the special ~priviledge~ of my favourites. Somehow I don't think that they would be happy about this 8D

scarletmorning: (IsaacGaret Yeah)
Yesterday was an all around sucky day. Let's forget all about it. -_-

BUT.

Look here at yourfonts.com. Jan., 23rd, is National Handwriting Day and to celebrate it you can make your very own font there for free! Out of your own handwriting 8D I did it and it's the best thing ever. You only need this code: CPN4NHD2012. This offer is only today on the 23rd.

So, gogogogogo get your own font 8D 8D 8D
scarletmorning: (Eirika)
I hate waking up in the morning after a bad/uncomfortable dream. They're not outright bad or scary (almost never scary), but when I wake up, I'm in a bad mood. A really bad "everything in the world sucks, me included" mood. And if I'm unlucky (dnc if that's a word or not), then the mood will stay for the rest of the day.

Fucking dreams.

Why am I having so many un-nice dreams lately? Fuck you, brain and subconscious.

Edit:

Fuck everything and the world. I don't know why such anger and annoyance is boiling in me but I'm just so. HNG. Graaaaaaaaaaaaarghl. Just. Cannot this day die in a fire? Just go away, day. No one will miss you.
scarletmorning: (Seth is rescuing damsels)
What is so magical about Starbucks that I can only write there? No shiny internet access with my computer there, I guess. Anyway; I'm semi-content with my Secret Santa gift :/ The worst part is fretting about the possibility that the recipient doesn't like it and that I'm therefore messing it up. Gargl.

Also, big brother´s birthday today. It's always unfortunately to have a birthday close to a gift-exchanging holiday. You normally get a little less presents. *loves presents. Also likes giving presents*

Also also, Zedernbrot from Gundel <3 Citrony goodness.
scarletmorning: (Default)
This is really a strange and emotionally draining time for me. If I'm not very responsive or here, then it's because I'm scared as fuck of social interaction. I've predicated that sometime close before leaving my panic would come.

Well, it's here now. And I'm constantly close to tears. So, I really do not have the energy to socially interact now. The sole thought of being alone in England and having to socialise with everybody without someone familiar to fall back on is terrifying. So only the thought drains the little tolerance I have. Oh, and if I seem mood and grouchy then that's a sign that my tolerance level has been overstepped and I'm on my last legs. I apologize in advance should I act like an asshole. Or just never reply. Or sound passive-aggressive.

At least it's not a "OMG I can't fucking go!" panic. Only a "OMFG I have to talk to people and be alone with them and alone and alone and what if they're assholes and what if we hate each other and what if they smoke and are assholes about it and what ifwhatifwhatif". A very uncomfortable and nasty panic.

Also, my foot still hurts and so I'm constantly feeling a bit sick. What a combination.

On another, hopefully distracting note:

I have no idea why September is meta month. If I weren't so panicked, I would care more about it, but at the moment I'm too drained. However, if you want to hear my thoughts on something, just say it. It might be a good distraction. Well, I'd do it later sometime.

/doesn't care if there are any typos in here. I can't re-read this now.

Edit: Art, because it distracted me :)

scarletmorning: (Barbossa)
Have I already told you lately that I hate people who write viruses? Because I do. And I kinda start to hate my writing computer because he caught the same virus he caught just a few days ago again. Seriously. What kind of fail is that!?

Rage.

Also, 17th September. You are coming closer and closer. *flail*

On another, Fire Emblem related note: I kinda hate my Innes piece. I like the first scene and I love the last, as of yet not written scene, but the stuff in between is so hnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn. I'm not sure if it's Innes, if it's Hayden, if it's my writing or the fact that this doesn't feel right. Argl. This makes me very unhappy.

Ugh, such a wasted and sucky day. Also, I don't manage to care about [livejournal.com profile] fe_contest at the moment. Too annoyed and unhappy. Blargh. (I like "Blargh" and "Argl". Might be my favourite words next to "also" and "anyway")
scarletmorning: (Kent; You did what?)
16.5% of the population of Germany is under 18 years old.

16.5%

Of roughly 83 million people.

That's what you get when you never support children and their needs. Or cut the money for schools and kindergardens. Don't act all surprised now, politicians. You're definitely not innocent.

Oh, and the climate? Yes, sometimes it truly feels like Germany is a children-unfriendly country. Stop bitching about children´s noises when you move in next to a kindergarden and said kindergarden was already there when you moved in.

Serious
ly, guys. Stop being stupid. Stop just moaning about the missing kids and DO SOMETHING FOR POTENTIAL PARENTS SO THAT GETTING CHILDREN DOESN'T LOOK SO HORRIBLE AND LIKE THE END OF THE WORLD (and your social life).
scarletmorning: (Secret of Mana)
I'm really grumpy today. I had a really shitty dream that managed to drain me mentally and a bit physically. Which is hilarious in a bad way. Gragl. >> And then I had that sad and also draining dream yesterday (in which for the first time an online friend appear, oh boy v_v) TrollLyon does make me a bit happier tho.

Anyway, need to go to the bank later to learn a bit about credit cards and which I can use in England. Because in approximately 2 months and 1 day (or 2) I will arrive in England. Which is also a bit scary.

Not a happy day. :(

PS: Hmmm, Secret of Mana icon makes me a bit more happy as well... And Eureka. But also only a bit... and three small bits can't defeat one big blob of grump. :(

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