Alle Kunst ist der Freude gewidmet

TOMORROWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

*flail* *meep* *superflail*

Edit:

I think I've packed all the things now. ... *is still flailing* So excited and a bit scared. ;A; I don't think I can sleep tonight.

It will be awesome. It will be awesome. It will be awesome /repeats forever

Edit2:

I've tried to write some semi-sexiness to distract myself, but I've noticed once again that I'm not good at writing sexy. It's very important to be good at picking out the right words, in which I am... not particularly good, methinks.

Anyway, not as flaily now. I fear I might cry a bit later since all the bad things turn up when it's dark. Hopefully not though ;A;

This is really a strange and emotionally draining time for me. If I'm not very responsive or here, then it's because I'm scared as fuck of social interaction. I've predicated that sometime close before leaving my panic would come.

Well, it's here now. And I'm constantly close to tears. So, I really do not have the energy to socially interact now. The sole thought of being alone in England and having to socialise with everybody without someone familiar to fall back on is terrifying. So only the thought drains the little tolerance I have. Oh, and if I seem mood and grouchy then that's a sign that my tolerance level has been overstepped and I'm on my last legs. I apologize in advance should I act like an asshole. Or just never reply. Or sound passive-aggressive.

At least it's not a "OMG I can't fucking go!" panic. Only a "OMFG I have to talk to people and be alone with them and alone and alone and what if they're assholes and what if we hate each other and what if they smoke and are assholes about it and what ifwhatifwhatif". A very uncomfortable and nasty panic.

Also, my foot still hurts and so I'm constantly feeling a bit sick. What a combination.

On another, hopefully distracting note:

I have no idea why September is meta month. If I weren't so panicked, I would care more about it, but at the moment I'm too drained. However, if you want to hear my thoughts on something, just say it. It might be a good distraction. Well, I'd do it later sometime.

/doesn't care if there are any typos in here. I can't re-read this now.

Edit: Art, because it distracted me :)

HOMG, I just got my welcome folder from Kent 8DDDDDDDDD So excite~ Now I can enroll~

I'm actually really excited. With fear. Is that a good sign? Hopefully 8D

(Also, I've said it before but I really do hate the people who write Trojans and viruses and send them around. Go... not die in a fire, but step on a lego. A nasty lego.)

Now back to Secret of Mana. PS: I downloaded the soundtrack 8D It makes me happy~

(Let's see if lj actually lets me update)

So. Much emotional stress the last few days. This whole ERASMUS thing, the documents I need, confusion about said documents, all came at once. I felt like shit yesterday (I'm thankfully quite good now. Taking one day to calm down and get accustomed to the thought and everything helps.)

I'm not sure if I should thank lj for that since I didn't whine to my flist. On the other hand, for once I actually wanted some support (which... happens rarely because I never want to bother other people with my problems, because they're, well, my problems and not their problems. Even if they secretly stress me out like this). Argl.

Anyway. Onwards to nicer things.

"The Derelict" by  Abney Park = love. I love the text. Love love love 8D

Also, In Extremo concert tomorrow <3

I'm not sure if it's hilarious that the baristas at my usual Starbucks only have to ask "cold or warm" and then already know what to do or if I should be worried me going there too often (and always taking the same. But mocha is so yummy~).

....

It's mostly amusing, I believe XD

Also, writing is okay. :/ A bit inspirationless but still somehow writing... Oh well.

Hm, Swedish exam next week. The test exam today was better than I thought so I'm good. For now. There are still things I need to revise but otherwise yay 8D


Omgomgomg, only one week then term is over D8 And then only shortly until England /angsts (a bit)

"Love" by Abney Park also sounds creepy XD You creepers, you~

Edit:

Whatwhatwhat? There are some guests from Canada and I'm supposed to ~entertain~ the younger ones? D8< What kind of fuckery? jkghaoiru I don't want to talk with them. I hate talking with strangers (yup, I'm not the centre of fun.) And about what should I talk? My big problem with keeping up conversations IS that I never know about what I should talk DX DX DX Unhappiness. Great, now I'm annoyed gpishergbpai Hate.

So, there was a Mediavistik Day at my university today. It was quite awesome. Unfortunately (or fortunately) I learnt a few things:

1. I need moar Mediavistik in my life. Like, seriously.

1.2 I need definitely moar heraldry in my life. Very, very much.

2. Thanks to the horrible, horrible Winter Verlag, I want moar books. On history, linguistics and other stuff. Unfortunately, they are expensive. And I still have too much books to read ;A;

3. I buy faster than I read. A problem. (A lovable problem, though)

4. I want to sing a few Minnelieder. Because there was a short presentation about Minnelieder where we sang. And it was pretty 8D But it wouldn't sound as nice because the choir sounded awesome~

5. The professor who is giving the lecture on the Karolinger is awesome and his voice~ So pleasant~ I could listen to him all day. And, well, he teaches exactly about the time period I love. Awesome~

Other learnings that have nothing to do with the Mediavistik Day:

6. My contest piece is evil. Everytime I think it through it has another ending. And I like all of them ;A; The tone always changes a bit and I like all the changes. But I can't decide >< Evil.

7. I want to write Hayden+tiny!Innes. Kinda like the prompt on the long forgotten fe_fest . Because yay family fics 8D

8. HOLY SHIT. IN ALMOST TWO MONTHS THERE WILL BE KENT. WELL, I'LL BE IN KENT, IN UNIVERSITY, ALL ALONE DDDDDDDDDDDDD8 8D DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD8 Just a teeeeeeeeeensy bit scared at the moment. Scaryscaryscary ;^;

9. There is no point nine, but I like odd numbers. 8D

10. Need to buy Abney Park CDs. Like now (ie. later) 8D

11. Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh, no even numbersssssssssss >8I

--------------------------

Now, to distract me from the scary, I make a meme:

Challenge me!
Give me the weirdest situation you can think of, a crack prompt so impossible your brain breaks when you think about it and/or challenge me to write in a different writing style. I will make them happen!

I would prefer FE8 or 9/10 though, since just writing FE7 characters would be a challenge ;P Of course, drabble length.

OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

I've just got an email from Kent~ (Not the FE Kent, you sillys~) Now I will leafe through the courses~ Iiiiiiih, autumn = Kent time~

(Kent icon, you are not entirely appropriated >:>)

Also, since I just remembered it: does anyone of you know a good horror/Gothic comic? One that has a good horrific atmosphere. With maybe interesting panel montage and characters that make you shiver? It's all for a paper and I have to resort to Sandman, or worse to Black Hole if I don't come up with something better. I want to look at From Hell if I find it in time... I want to write something about evoking emotions with certain techniques and the use of stereotypes (probably), but both Sandman and Black Hole only bored me and weren't really... what I would call a Gothic/horror comic. And how can I write about emotions being evoked if I felt nothing myself?

We got a really random package today. Nazi propaganda. Seems like there is a group who randomly sends out these things and hopes that some people believe the shit they write. Oh lawd. To be honest? That was the most hilarious read I've had for weeks. Just apply logic and common sense to propaganda and it falls apart. The reasoning and excusing of criminals was so bad and illogical that I had to laugh while reading. Truly hilarious. (It's not so funny that they're sending this shit around though)

On a different note:
I have exams on Saturday, Monday, Tuesday and Thursday. Saturday will probably be okay, Monday is ohgodwhatisthisidon'tknow, Tuesday will probably kinda good and Thursday is, uhm, probably okay as well? A fun week. At least then the semester is overrrrrr. Two essays and one Hausarbeit for the free time, yay -.-

BUT!

The Erasmus meeting is tomorrow and I will finally learn more about the University of Kent :D 9 months in England~ (Am still not scared of it, I r confused)